i want to go back in time and find myself
at fifteen. there's one minute in particular where i
was balanced on the edge of recovery and relapse and
sitting with a blade in between my fingers and trying to decide 
if i had any reason to really give it up and i
remember thinking 'if someone would 
hold me, i could be saved'.  
it did not occur to me 
to wrap my arms around my own body.

i want to take that little broken girl and fold
her against my chest, i want to stroke the back 
of her head and let her cry until her insides are raw
and her eyes run dry.